I had a best friend for 15 years. We both moved multiple
times, but we always managed to keep in touch. We were always there for each
other, no matter what happened. I finally saw her in person after 7 years of
not seeing each other, and something was different. I kept asking her what was bothering
her and she insisted that nothing was, while fitting insults into our weirdly
generic conversation. I wracked my brain trying to figure out what I had done
wrong, but came up empty handed. I’ll admit, it was painful. In this short
trip, I had lost my best friend – the one person who had been by my side for
the past 15 years. I reached out a couple times after, but I was unanswered. I slowly
unfollowed her on social media, because seeing her posts just reminded me of
how much I missed her and our friendship.
I slowly accepted that we may never speak again. It took me
a couple hours with a therapist to get there, but I did. A few times I thought about
what I would do if she ever reached out to me, because I genuinely didn’t know
what I would do. I didn’t obsess over it – I’d muse for a few moments, and then
Almost 2 years after my worst (friendship) heartbreak, I
woke up to a message from her. It was apologetic and loving.
The point of this story is that it would’ve been easy to say
“Screw her. She’s a bad person.” It would have been easy to block her and forget
about her. It would have been easy to taint 15 years of wonderful memories
because of one trip. It’s definitely easy to become jaded and think that everyone’s
Sometimes good people do bad things. Heck, I’ve done things
I have needed to apologize for. We all have.
I don’t know if my relationship with this friend will ever
be the same again. I don’t even know if we’ll talk regularly. But what I do know,
if that she did the right thing. She reached out when it wasn’t easy to, and she opened the door to continuing our friendship. I know that she’s mentally in a much better
place now. I know that she’s not a bad person.
Have faith that good people will be good. Have faith that
people (including ourselves) will see their mistakes and apologize for them, even if it takes a long time. Have
faith that not everyone sucks and is out to get you, even though it feels like
Have faith in people, because you never know who’s going to